Intolerable Pain (poem by LL)

Intolerable Pain

It feels like a pain I've never known,               

like the tearing of my flesh to increase the size of the hole, 

The hole in my heart from him going away,  

and rejecting me too day after day,

Mixed messages that were sent or perhaps just misread,                                                            

maybe just all in my head,

How do I go on, what do I do now?                       

I can’t sleep, I can't think, I just don't know how,

I want to just cry all day & all night,                      

I don't think I'm ever gonna feel alright, 

I want him to know how much I love him & that this makes me so sad, 

But I want him to remember all the fun times we've had, 

I've always thought of myself as strong as a rock, steady as stone, 

All I want to do these days is curl up in a ball & cry all alone, 

This pain is even beyond 'cutting', it's too much for even that to soothe,

So what the fuck am I supposed to do?

God, what did I do to deserve this?

How do I get back from this dark place I'm in?

(Written 4-3-09)

Poem reading by me👇

🟪🟪 https://youtu.be/KfaOJtqqK0o?si=fMG_NwOl3UKsl59D 🟪🟪